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We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community who have vaginas to share the things they wish they had learned about their bodies sooner. No matter who you are or how you identify, if you have a vagina and wish to learn more about your body, I hope these responses bring you some clarity.
1.
“You don’t always get wet during sex.”
“You can be having a good time and still not get very wet. Even if you do get wet, it might not be enough. Thank goodness I found an amazing partner who doesn’t feel weird about using lube.”
—mbpanja26
2.
“The vaginal canal is angled.”
“When I was younger and had just gotten my period, I had trouble putting a tampon in. I thought something was wrong with me until I decided to put a finger up there and realized that the canal was angled! No one ever told me.”
3.
“All vulvas are different.”
“It’s those differences that make all vulvas beautiful! The labia majora (outer lips) length can be up to around 12 cm. The labia minora (inner lips) length can be up to roughly 10 cm. The labia itself can be thicker or thinner, darker or lighter, and sometimes longer on one side. Some people have wide vaginal openings and others have small. The clitoris can be big or small, and it may stick out or be tucked away under the clitoral hood. Vulvas come in a whole rainbow of skin colors. Additionally, the vulva can have a wide range of textures with varying amounts of pubic hair. There is no such thing as a ‘normal’ looking vulva. Vaginas and vulvas are just as unique as faces, which is what makes them so incredible!”
4.
“Menstruation does not just mean ‘bad cramps.'”
“Symptoms of PMS and menstruation may include: bloating, cramps, constipation, food cravings, anxiety, depression, weight gain, and so much more! We need to start educating everyone on this and be more understanding.”
—r49a54a93f
5.
“Do not use scented products to clean or mask the odor of your private bits.”
E! / Via media.giphy.com
“This can and will cause worse smelling bacteria to grow and can cause infections.”
—hannahburrow
6.
“You can pee with a tampon in.”
“I didn’t know until college when someone mentioned it. I went though so many tampons before that.”
—mdoiej567
7.
“Not everyone born with a vagina has a uterus, or vice versa.”
“I learned when I was 15 years old that I didn’t have a vagina and that I will never be able to carry a child. 1 in 4,500 females are born with this syndrome called MRKH.“
—bidulify
9.
“Many people can’t have a vaginal orgasm.”
“I can only climax through clitoral stimulation and I thought that was ‘weird’ for way too long.”
—jaymay25
10.
“Discharge is normal.”
ABC / Via media.giphy.com
“It’s an important indicator of your vaginal health and should not be embarrassing.”
—bubbles1344
11.
“When your water breaks, it’s not one splash and done.”
“It just keeps coming, over and over again.”
—mollieroque
13.
“Your cervix moves up and down throughout your cycle.”
“I’m 28 and found this out recently after getting an IUD and learning to check my strings. It also made a lightbulb go off as to why some sex positions were more uncomfortable certain times but not others.”
14.
“Periods aren’t supposed to feel like they’re truly killing you.”
NBC / Via media.giphy.com
“With all the hype as a kid about period cramps and women overreacting, I assumed that I was too. I’ve always had 10+ day periods and bleed VERY heavily throughout the entire time. It wasn’t until I was about 21 that I found out I had endometriosis, and that it’s actually pretty common.”
—paigesibell
15.
“Certain lubes and spermicides can cause yeast infections.”
“For some people, silicone and glycerin-based lubes can throw off vaginal pH and lead to a really bad infection.”
16.
“Your pubic hair is there as a defense against bacteria and infections.”
“Choosing to remove it or keep it is absolutely your call and you can and will have a healthy environment down there either way, but if you do remove it all, make sure you keep your bits extra safe by wearing clean, cotton underwear, peeing after sex, and changing out of sweaty clothes as soon as you can. Do these things if you have a bush too; it’s just especially worth remembering if you have no pubic hair.”
—bexsticles
18.
“It’s important to know what actually happens during a miscarriage.”
“The bleeding can last for weeks, the amount of blood and tissue passed can vary (tissue can be the size of a tennis ball), and there are different ways it can happen. There should be so much more education surrounding what happens before it’s actually happening.”
—mrsmeow86
19.
“Pee after sex.”
CBC / Via media.giphy.com
“Every. Damn. Time. I wish someone had told me this before my first UTI. It flushes the bacteria out that might be in/around your urethra after doing the nasty.”
20.
“Everyone’s vagina is different.”
“For instance, I had a hymen so thick it had to be surgically removed. That’s totally normal! It happens to lots of people and isn’t a big deal, but the media and society made it such a taboo to talk about my inability to use tampons or to masturbate that I didn’t find out until I had an ovarian cyst and my doctor couldn’t get an internal ultrasound inside me. It’s super important to be open and honest with your doctors!”
21.
“Your pregnancy can be overdue.”
“This is especially common for first time parents. Also, sometimes your water doesn’t break on its own and the doctor has to do it. Mine never did.”
22.
“It’s normal to have those bleach stains in my underwear from my vagina.”
“It’s actually pretty cool that our bodies are powerful enough to bleach fabric!”
23.
“Female newborn babies may have spotting too.”
“It’s caused by the withdrawal of hormones they were exposed to in the womb.”
24.
“I didn’t know the urethra and vagina were two different holes until late in high school.”
ABC / Via media.giphy.com
25.
“The appearance of your vulva changes with puberty.”
“I expected things like hair growth, but I had no idea that the shape, color, etc. develop and change too as you go through puberty.”
26.
“Penetrative sex shouldn’t hurt and sometimes isn’t possible.”
“Around one third of people with vaginas will experience a form of pelvic floor dysfunction in their lifetime, which can make sex feel painful or impossible. I finally saw a pelvic floor physical therapist and that helped so much, but it’s still something I am working through.”
—shuliew
27.
“There’s more to it than ‘having sex = getting pregnant.'”
“It’s important to learn about fertile windows, miscarriages, age and fertility, subchorionic hematoma, ectopic pregnancies, and all the things to be aware of before and when it’s time to plan for a family.“
28.
And, “Your vagina does not get ‘ruined‘ from having sex.”
iOne Digital / Via media.giphy.com
“There is nothing shameful about having a vagina or enjoying it, either with a partner or alone! You have the right to make all the decisions about your vagina, and those decisions do not need to be negotiable!”
—slothlife207
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and clarity.
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